It’s the End of the Year as We Know It (Bye-Bye 2012)

by Dr. David Mandler

Many of us want to reflect at the end of the year about what the old year has brought, and what we would like the new one to bring. Instead of coherent and well-developed paragraphs that only a handful of people would bother to read in any case, I’ll condense my reflections into a few and but minimally coherent points.

1. Since ours is an overwhelmingly egocentric culture, it is entirely understandable why Ipads and Ipods have become so popular while the Yugo has become all but extinct.

2. With the presidential election season over, most people, when asked about the losing and sore loser candidate, would answer, “Romney who?”

3. The year 2012 was entirely unoriginal with news items such as violence between Gaza and Israel (with Hamas recycling pictures from Syria to demonstrate Israeli brutality against civilians as a novelty item in media warfare), the continuation of Syrian president Assad’s campaign against those who have had enough of him (with a death toll now surpassing 40,000), the financial crises in various countries around Europe, multiple natural disasters around the world. The much needed exception intended to confirm the rule was the long-awaited reappearance of North Korea’s Kim Jung Il, looking better than ever now enclosed in a glass container and preserved for eternity as the embodiment of male beauty.

4. New Yorkers have learned that taking the subway is not only a source of frustration (trains late on schedule), entertainment (live music and dancers with tin boxes), misery (the many unsolicited exhibitions of derangement in the form of the homeless roaming the subway cars on all fours), and the living demonstrations of Darwin’s survival of the fittest (scrambling for the last empty seat–and once found, squeezing in between two extraordinarily obese bodies), but may also be the last journey one may ever take (with the phrase “pushy customers” assuming an entirely different meaning).

5. Sandy will no longer conjure up fond memories of a young heterosexual John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John but rather of blackouts and massive property damage.

6. The negative effects of 2012’s extreme weather phenomena will be made manifest for more than a million New York’s public school students (and their teachers) as the traditional five-day February break will be shortened by three days supposedly to make up for the lost days during Hurricane Sandy. Never mind that the students who will gain these three days will not be in the same classes that lost the three days in the fall term.

7. 2012: the year of Gangham Style and its numerous spawns.

8. 2012: the year in which Lady Gaga could not come up with anything to surpass herself. Maybe in 2013. (Too bad Kim Jung Il had anticipated Lady Gaga by having himself mummified first).

9. The countdown to 2013 on New Year’s Eve will serve to focus the mind on how much time is left before the U.S. falls into the fiscal cliff the Congress and the president created in order to avoid it later.

10. Fill in the blank with your own reflection (add in the comment section).

The year 2012 is over. Welcome 2013!